The man we are following prefers to remain anonymous. We shall only refer to him as Jonny Anti-Appleseed. Please do not pester him for personal information. You may contact his publicist, Pheobe Waffle, at thefruitsofthefuture@gmail.com if you have any questions pertaining to his special condition.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Day 00, Where It All Began

Our story begins when Jonny was only five. He had his first encounter with the dreaded fruit. Sitting in the shade of his mother's most prized tree, Jonny pondered the meaning of life. At a young age, he was very in tune with the forces of nature. And then things took a turn for the worse. For it was under the shade of that very tree that Jonny had a life changing experience. From above a cursed object plummeted, it made contact with his cranium and shattered his tender soul. Because of this traumatic event, Jonny is unable to recall any happy details of his childhood. He only recalls the nightmares that haunted him in the wee hours of the night. Though most are too horrid to relay, we will say this: Jonny has never been the same.

Fifteen years later, at the age of twenty he came to terms with his illness. He knew he had a problem and has decided to try to rise above it. By sharing his story with the world, he hopes to influence the minds of other afflicted personages.

So, please, if know anyone suffering from malusdomesticaphobia you must let them know that they are not alone. This condition is abnormal but statistics show that one in 342 people have at least a mild case. Together we can conquer our fears.